Author: Jared Males

MagAO-X 2020A Stay At Home Day 7: Poopie Suits & An Ancient Mystery

I was actually aghast that Logan’s post last week was the very first appearance of the Poopie Suit on this fine blog. After nearly 8 years and more than 560 blog posts, it’s utterly ridiculous that a surface sailor posted the first poopie suit pic. She probably wasn’t even wearing tennis shoes.

So let’s rectify the sitch. Here are a couple of pics from when I was on the USS Pasadena (SSN-752).

That’s me on the right. Colby Matthews is relieving me as Officer of the Deck on the surface. It’s kind of rare to catch an SSN on the surface, but it was also always our favorite watch. Lots of wind, you usually got wet (we’re strapped in for a reason), and you got some sun. Since we both have smooth chins this must be shortly after we left Pearl.
This is maybe more recognizable after a couple of weeks out (and maybe not sleeping for a day or three). Note that I’m keeping it neat though, that fire fighting mask still needs a good seal. Kinda apropos.
The insignia you see on my poopie suit are the Submariner’s Dolphins. You basically have to be able to draw every fluid/mechanical/electrical/air system on the ship from memory, know how to operate everything, and prove it during a bunch of drills, to earn that. Logan is wearing the equivalent “water wings” for surface sailors. For U.S. submariners, it’s actually the fish (mahi mahi), not the mammal. But we always felt special when Dolphins joined us on the surface. Our Captain had even figured out that all ahead standard turns for twelve was the optimum Dolphin amusement speed in a 688 class.
Some more dolphins from the bridge of Pasadena off Oahu. Just because they’re pretty.

So one of the things that some of my shipmates and I have been talking about is how similar our current globally mutual situation is to going to sea on a submarine. Feeling isolated? Same small cramped space every day? Stuck with the same small group of people/cats (not necessarily of your choice)? Pervasive smell of diesel, monoethylamine, and sewage? Ok, if the last one applies maybe call a plumber and/or move.

Now if you really want to get a good submarine simulation, follow these guidelines. Seriously, I feel every one of those. But I lost it when I got to “Every so often, yell “EMERGENCY DEEP!” run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your partner for not having the kitchen area “Stowed for Sea!””. All too real. My key lesson learned for our current situation is that if we all end up eating canned three bean salad that we were storing on the hallway floor (and walking on), it will have gone on for too long.

The best modern submarine movie to get you in the groove is The Hunt For Red October. When on the Dallas, most of the extras were submariners, and the background chatter is A+. Listen for things like “conn, maneuvering, aye”, and the word perfect “concur, possible target zig based on bearing rate.”

If you really want to get claustrophobic, any WWII sub movie will do, but Das Boot is the clear winner.

We don’t talk about Crimson Tide.

And now for a message from our sponsors

Like space drafts, only on your own couch.

Many astro-towns have a public talk series, hosted in bars oddly enough (see below), where local astronomizers present their work for a non-specialist audience. In Tucson it’s called Space Drafts. The COVID hasn’t crossed this off the calendar completely: tomorrow from 1200-1900 MST/PDT you can learn all about a bunch of exciting astronomy topics, live streamed here:

Our very own Logan Pearce is up from 1800-1830 MST/PDT Tucson time. Grab a cold one and tune in!

Now on to the ancient mystery. This is one of my favorite pics from the 752. It was a long time ago, but I’ll try to describe it. . .

This is taken at a place called Jim’s in Bahrain, in late March 2003. If you’ve seen Casablanca you kinda know the role Jim’s played there, though not with the same panache. Shown are most of the junior officers on Pasadena and the Eng, an MMCS (senior chief), an MM1, and a couple of O-gang friends who were on a CG out of Pearl. I’m pretty sure that “Nerd” and the Weps had the duty on the boat, and the XO is the photog. (inside baseball: b/c I was the Damage Control Assistant at the time, I almost certainly bought every single one of the senior chief’s beers that night)

Now you might notice that not every sailor looks completely ready to stand watch. Which leads to the mystery posed in one of my favorite songs:

Not actually the best version by USNA Glee on youtube, but I picked it for the venue. Honest question: what amateurs use a motorized stage to focus a camera? It’s all worth it at 1:55 though.

Here’s a more traditional version:

Fun fact: I’ve actually been kicked out of a bar in Charleston for over-requesting this song (Charleston S.C. is the home of Navy Nuclear Power School). Long story, it was a group effort and Irish folk bands can get touchy.

The final version really captures the essence of the song:

MagAO-X 2020A Stay At Home Day -1: The Run That Never Was & A Study In Jolene

Since most of the MagAO-X team resides in Tucson, home of the University of Arizona and Steward Observatory, we are about to come under a stay-at-home policy starting tomorrow, 3/31, at 5 pm MST. This removes all doubt: there will be no MagAO-X run in 2020A. We are on the telescope schedule for May 3-10; to make this, we need to ship next week. And despite all the hard work we’ve put in since returning from our last run, we have a metric sh&*%t ton of work to do before we can be ready to ship. Because we have all been working from home out of prudence for the last couple of weeks, and now we are working from home under orders, there is no way we’ll get it done. Further complications include: LCO is shutdown until 27 April at the earliest; political unrest has started up again and is expected to increase; and we couldn’t fly to Santiago even if the ExAO system made it. Granted there is a lot of time between now and May 3rd, but our decision horizon is much shorter given the vagaries of international cargo shipping in the best of times. [note for completeness: that we do have a poorly developed backup plan to drive ourselves in a U-Haul. A ferry is involved.]


To say it clearly: MagAO-X 2020A is canceled.

We are now planning a late 2020B run, Nov or Dec. So start your telescope proposals.



So here’s the thing. Astronomy is not currently urgent. We astronomers/astrophysicists/optical-scientists don’t have a lot to add to the current goings on. But, (1): we shouldn’t let that cause us to relax. Apropos:

Astronomy can be urgent . . .

And (2): astronomy is still important. As a for instance: we are now all likely paying close attention to how dependent we are on the transportation of resources from point A to B. Now just consider how much of a role GPS plays in this. Sure, that’s based on 400 to 100 year old Astronomy — but it is a key example of what Astronomizing produces. It’s also an excellent illustration of the acute differences between urgent and important. Which are sometimes the same, but often not.

Now to the point: this is the first post of our 2020A stay-at-home blog series. The rules are as usual: the title must start as this post’s does, and there must be a song of the day. I’m expecting the grad students to self organize from here on out, with the option to recruit faculty, post-docs (at any institution), etc., to help share the load. We’re all in this together, and this run will last as long as it takes.

Back in the bad old days of the Long Runs, Alan Uomoto once remarked about our blog “The videos are a nice touch … although I admit I wasn’t able to tease out the blogger’s mental state as readily as I thought I might.” Let’s see what he can do with this.

When Dolly Parton sings her famous song “Jolene”, it sounds almost gleeful, despite the lyrics. To wit:

Basically, Dolly wins in the end and you can tell. Now Miley (Dolly’s goddaughter) delivers it in a more moving tone, sad, but not hopeless:

You don’t really know how it ends though. Any case, this is all really just an excuse to post some rock. If you’ve read this post on this blog for this long, it’s a solid chance that you’re a nerd. So you might claim to not know who the White Stripes are, but you are probably wrong. Just listen to the first 5 seconds of this and get back to me. (come on . . . that’s likely the most recognizable guitar riff of the last 30 years)

The ‘Stripes version of Jolene is completely different.

Jack White’s version is that of a woman who has already lost. And it rocks (yeah).

But wait! Shouldn’t we be giving a message of hope, not despair? In these trying times? Well . . . actually. The thing you should notice most about the White Stripes is how there are 2 microphones. And when the shit hits the fan, Jack always turns and he and Meg rock through it together. It’s an awesome performance style, and it’s what we all need to do.

Appendix: I struggled with which version to post, and ended up with my overall favorite performance. This next one falls under our we have standards mantra, in that I think it’s the best guitar performance of the three:

And this one is the classic. It’s the most heartfelt vocal performance:

Ok grad students. I know how much free time you have on your hands. Don’t let me down.

MagAO-X 2019B Day 13: It Works!

Well that was exciting.

The last three of us are on our way back to Tucson. We love being at LCO, but after spending most of two months there it’s a great feeling to be going home.

In case you missed it, MagAO-X works! We can close the loop on sky with real starlight propagating through real turbulence. Laird, Olivier, and I first started developing the concept of MagAO-X in early 2015, and many people have contributed along the way. I’d like to especially acknowledge the awesome contributions of the “army of grad students” [not my words] that really made MagAO-X come together over the last 4 years. Great job team.

We are all super thrilled to finally see our hard work pay off. Here’s to many more successful MagAO-X runs at LCO!

To my knowledge the tradition has not yet been upheld on this run. So here it is.

Hi Mom.

Our driver made sure to point out the locals on the way down.

Owl sighting

La Serena looks, to us passers-though, like it’s more or less normal. That may not be 100% true, but it’s nice to see some familiar characters.

The street performers are back.

Way back in 2012 an intrepid, fresh-faced crew of AOistas stopped at the SCL Holiday Inn for Pisco Sours after a long run at LCO. Laird, Alex, and I recreated that photo at the very same table. A few things have changed (though I still have never seen a pirate mine).

A tradition too

The big caveat is that the run isn’t quite over, at least not for me. MagAO-X itself isn’t on the way yet, but will be following us in the next week or so. I won’t be able to completely relax until it’s safely back the in lab at Steward Observatory. Hopefully fewer delays than the trip down, and we’ll be back to work after the New Year.

MagAO-X 2019B Day 0: Thanksgiving Arrival

Maggie, Joseph, Alex, Kyle, Laird, and Jared arrived at LCO today to prepare MagAO-X for our first time on-sky.  We missed thanksgiving with our non-LCO families, but the chefs made us turkey so we got a good holiday meal (thanks guys!).

We’ve already started MagAO-X back up and are making a bunch of last minute tweaks to get it ready.

Our cleanroom friend couldn’t quite believe were are back so soon!

MagAO-X 2019B Blog Rules:

  1. There will be at least one blog post each day
  2. The blog post of the day will have a song of the day

The song of the day is The Thanksgiving Song by Adam Sandler